This is my opinion as of this time. I might have a totally different view later. People change, so does my perspective.
This morning on my commute home, inside a Grabcar...I was just staring out at the road as the car sped fast.
I had a lot in my mind and I suddenly asked this question..."What are you looking for?"
Flashes of videos, pictures, and everything that ever crossed my mind came to me:
Big wedding party
And then, little glimpses of graveyard popped up. And I thought..."Well...I'll end up here one day! But I don't know when, where and how."
Will I live till 90's?
Well...I google and according to Worldbank, Indonesia's life expectancy in 2017 is...
Okay...so statistically speaking...I've got 44 years ahead (if only I could live for 70 years)...
Truth is...no one exactly knows when their time is up. When will they leave this world. How will they die...so to speak.
I further google what a graveyard looks like. What a liang kubur actually is...
This miniature says it all. I don't know in another religion or culture but in Islam the summary is:
The deceased is washed
The deceased is covered in a white sheet (kain kafan)
The deceased is prayed (Mourners participate in group prayers)
The deceased is buried under dirt
Taking this into perspective helps me realize that what I'm stressing over in my life is nothing.
No amount of stress. No amount of fame. No amount of money. No amount of children. No amount of houses. No amount of anything that this world could offer can accompany you once you die.
You're there. Alone. And your body starts decaying. Rotten. Being eaten by cockroaches. Worms. Maggots. And all sorts of disgusting little creatures.
And maybe in 6 months...you're dry...it remains your skeleton.
I know this is a common fact. It's no brainer. It's no rocket science where you have to go to school to understand this very basic truth.
Everything that is alive will die.
Let me repeat.
Everyone will die.
Your boss will die.
Your spouses will die.
Your parents will die.
YOU...will die as well.
It's such a common knowledge that I always forget this basic truth.
I to this day still stress over work.
I to this day still think of how to throw a big wedding party.
I to this day still think of how to be rich.
I to this day still think many other things that are all worldly enjoyments.
Sometimes I stress over things that is not worth-stressing over like work. Peer pressure. Society recognition. And many other things.
Sometimes I drag myself to face Mondays cause I know it's gonna be hectic. It's gonna be physically - more than anything else mentally draining for me.
I know I've said this before that I am an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person).
Words are a double-edged sword for me.
When words are positive, encouraging, motivating that's where my mind will be.
But...when words are negative, humiliating, and even destructive, it affects me so deeply.
It affects me to a deeper level where probably most people easily shake them off.
Maybe I have to admit that I have become "depressed" in a way.
Especially in an environment where everything is fast.
Everything is deadlines.
Everything is judged.
But I discovered that just by visualizing a liang kubur helps put my mind at ease knowing that whomever those "negative words" are uttered from...it doesn't matter because sooner or later those people will die. And the same story applies...they still end up in a liang kubur where their bodies finally will rot and be eaten by worms.
During this whole quarantine situation, everyone goes digital. Especially YouTube.
You see how some celebrities are changing cars as easy as changing clothes.
You see how rich people tend to show off their assets and streams of income.
You see how people post perfect pictures on their Instagrams.
You see how they like to show around their mansions, not houses.
The meritocracy wants you to promote yourself.
Social media wants you to broadcast a highlight reel of your life.
And nothing is wrong with that.
It's just for me personally, looking up to them make me jealous in a way.
And I know it depends on how you frame them. How you process them.
It could be an example that hard work pays off.
It could be an example that creativity and innovation and uniqueness sell well on YouTube.
On that note, I'd like to say my opinion on the newly released Kekeyi YouTube singing sensation...
I haven't watched the video...so let's watch them...
Point is there's no trend at all.
Creativity has no boundary.
I leave the rest to you.
Before I die...
I really want to establish an orphanage where orphans could get help.
Where orphans could get decent education and access to healthcare.
I even dream to celebrate my wedding at an orphanage.
Because I think they deserve it.
I mean instead of feeding those already well-fed people, I would rather feed those orphans cause for them eating meat might be a luxury that we all take for granted.
I would want to see them grow and repeat the cycle.
To help other orphans or those homeless people.
To eradicate poverty.
To help everyone in need.
I know it sounds too big of a dream, but that's what I have in mind.
Helping others warm my heart.
And it brings happiness in me.
Because at the end of the day, we just want to be happy, don't we?
Happiness is the ultimate goal that everyone is chasing after.
You know, people can say all sort of things about you.
About you being stupid.
About you being a pain in the *ss.
About you being slow.
About you not smart enough.
About your choice of clothes.
About how to live your life.
Liang kubur leads to humility.
Living a good life today, might depend on our ability to cultivate this rare attribute which is diminishing on a daily basis.
That we all as humans have got nothing to be cocky.
To be arrogant.
To be greedy.
Because liang kubur reminds me that no matter how big your mansion is.
How much money you make.
How many houses you build.
How many cars you drive.
How many places you travel to.
How high your position is.
We come from dirt.
We become dirt again.
I know this is an on going battle.
A struggle that everyone of use faces every day.
So I'll try to learn to visualize that graveyard.
That no matter who the person is, we all end up in our own graveyard - liang kubur.
~ Peace out, beautiful readers ~