• Sagi Sagara

Drenched in rain...

So...I went out for dinner with a friend of mine...and it rained...heavy downpour...

We talked about stuff...more like a heart-to-heart convo...

At the end, the rain had not ceased and we decided to leave the restaurant...

He ran...I walked...

Yesterday, I might have been bothered if it rained and I didn’t have an umbrella with me. An umbrella would be my first and preferred choice to protect me from the water.

But today, experience has taught me that if I don’t have an umbrella, I can either run to dodge the raindrops or I can grab whatever is around to repel the rain.

Or just walk casually as if it was not raining and enjoy the feeling of being drenched in rain...

...which I did just now...

And during the walk, I had a realization of the following things:

1. No Drama

I wish I was reliving a scene from my fav movie...but I wasn't. I would not be where I am today had it not been for the experiences that I have had in the past.




...Despite all the wonderful things that happened, the turmoil I have endured over the years has been challenging — to say the least. Though my social media highlight reel may seem amazing (I try not to post on social these days), there have been times where I wondered if I had made the right decision.

...Times where I wondered if I had ruined my life.

Times where I’ve been called foolish.

Times where I’ve cried wondering if my efforts would be good enough.

Times where I have leaned on my mum for tremendous support.

Times where I’ve been incredibly embarrassed.

...Times where I have cried for no reason at night.

Times where I had an acne breakout (still to this day)  —  from all of the stress and hormones.

...Times where people have made mistakes or missteps on me.

Times where I have laughed hysterically to keep from losing my mind.

...What happened was a lot of great and amazing things and a ton of not-so-great things...

Today's rain was a catalyst for reflection...

2. Slow down when the roads are slick

Slow down. Take stock of everything, read what you need to read, learn what you need to learn. But, do not quit.

3. Watch out for the puddles

There have been times on my journey where I have been so incredibly excited about something, that I became blinded by all the puddles surrounding me.

The lesson here is to not get so excited about opportunities or chances to help others that you downplay potential pitfalls.

Coba terus tapi tetep pake otak - so to speak...

4. Value of silence and presence

When I got to my kosan...I stood by the window and stared blankly to the streets...was alone and had no one to talk to. Sure, it would be a fine time for a heart-to-heart, but I was busy listening to the steady rainfall and, inhaling that incomparable, fresh smell of the damp ground. I was taking it all in, and there’s no need for words.

5. Appreciate what we have

Ya...kosan lu panas banget?

Kayaknya lu bisa pindah ke tempat yang lebih baik?

Kenapa lu nga ambil kosan AC?

Some comments from friends visiting my kosan...

By the way, I hate air-conditioned room. It makes me lazy and not productive.

Jadi apa salahnya tinggal di tempat tanpa AC.

But I am fully blessed to be able to afford this kosan where I could keep my plants alive, where I could enjoy direct sunlight, and where I could overlook Jalan Setiabudi...where I can turn on my Close Comfort to cool me down kalo lagi kepanasan, especially at keep me cool and be able to sleep comfortably and soundly...karena I know for fact that many people out there do not have a roof over their heads. Dan walaupun gue pake Close Comfort, bukan AC biasa, as long as I feel enough to cool myself down...I feel I have enough despite the constant nagging of comments from people visiting my room...

At some point, every one of us has felt the discomfort of being drenched and dripping and cold. There is something so nice about watching a storm batter the ground and whip the tree branches around, knowing that you’re sheltered and dry inside. Not everyone has that luxury, and sometimes it takes a rainy day to fully appreciate that fact.

6. Enjoy the moment

Waktu jalan kaki ke kosan hujan-hujanan...I was like...yes...pour baby pour...

The thing about rain is that it doesn’t last forever — so if you’re going to wash your hair or splash in puddles or go for a run or curl up with a good book, you’ve got to do it while you can.

7. Keep looking for sunshine

Selalu ingat besok akan ada matahari...seperti halnya whenever I am in trouble...I always say to myself..."this too shall pass!"

Hujan juga demikian. The rain has the power to wash away the bad and the sullied, so that you can begin anew.

Terima kasih hujan hari ini...

You bring out my melancholy side to life and so I write this...

~ Selamat malam Jakarta ~

~ Selamat hujan ~

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Day 20

~ My inner strength is invincible ~ ~ I let go of any fears of rejection ~ ~ I am grateful for each day of my life ~ ~ I know when to trust my intuition ~ ~ I am more than good enough ~ ~ I get better